Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Whine, It's what's for dinner

Revealing observations of my most personal feelings and experiences for all the world's strangers to see is kind of nerve racking. However thoughts and feelings are transient. A mystic might say that scooping up the thinks I do, is like pulling a bucket of water from a flowing river. The act of scooping changes the river, yet it remains the same. The thoughts can never be returned to where they were and so become forever changed, context changing.

Interest in my whiny diatribes is at an all time low. After reading many pieces on the dieting topics I know that it is a dry read. I try to keep perspective because it is the reasonable thing to do.  I also have observed that when someone takes off into "testifying for the cause mode" it quickly gets off putting. I try not to do that but sometimes . . . for example, I have added a video on the lower part of the column on the right. Statins did serious damage to me, boring or not I have a right to testify. Another thing that I don't know that I can do anything about is that some of my more insightful keystrokes happen in the middle of an otherwise dreadful episodes of me feeling sorry for myself. sigh-grumble-puke
Anyway on to this week's keystrokes.

Last week I got sidetracked talking about the mess that is my home. I kind of lost my point. The idea, that is still evolving, is that these new levels (and kinds of) of awareness that I am experiencing are throwing me off a bit. The ways I am reacting are interesting and sometimes frustrating. This refresh of my normal sensory/cognitive overload plays right into my increasing suspicion that my brain works differently than the standard model. (announcer voice) More on this as the story develops.

I have been putting it off but trying to type while sitting, has gotten even more tediously painful. The pain upon sitting comes quicker since I took a walk the other day. I had been doing my stretches and felt kinda good so I went up the street to the bluffs and took a stroll. I was okay at the time, refreshed. The next day sitting at the computer for 5 minutes had my butt yelling at me. To make it worse the super cool seat cushion in my car got a big hole ripped in it. The manufacturer is great about warrantied replacements (at those prices they should be) still, week or so to get a replacement is going to be hell. I will solve the mystery of the painful tuchus eventually but for now I devised a way to type lying flat on my back. Not ideal to facilitate more lying down when one of my goals is to be more active. Not being able to vent some of my excess thoughts by typing them out in a free stream of consciousness way was really not good. The other thing is that; for many years my bedroom was a sanctuary of calm and peace. No TV or distractions like that. For the longest time I didn't even have pictures on the wall. They too were a distraction. It was good. I also banned food from my bedroom. Now I have a monitor mounted right over the bed. I haven't been able to use the TV in the regular way because of the tuchus matter. So the monitor is hooked up to the media PC and the ROKU box. I get all of my TV, facebook other media lying flat on my back. It is certainly not unpleasant and with the extra time without weight right on the troubled area it may be able to heal some.
I went to a physical therapist yesterday. He has me doing special leg muscle streching exercises. I'll just have to do them for a while to know if it helps.

Like I said before when the words can flow freely writing is easier and more rewarding. I hope I will be able to inject a little more humor into what I type. It's better for my attitude and has to make reading easier. Fingers crossed.

I am writing this in advance of the Wednesday weight in. I skipped it on 9/19 for 2 reasons. Posting too often is tiresome for the kind people on facebook that cheer me on with 'likes'. Also some things have gone down that are distracting me from the dieting (for one example see previous post  (I mean) rant below). I will be surprised if I lost weight this time. Let's see.

Today's weigh in 327.5
down 1 since last time
down 26.2 since June.

Teeth in my head 24
down 5 since last july
down 8 since  . . well, overall

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